Trust in human relations
I keep finding this a very interesting topic. Trust is gained someone wrote to me recently. But is it really? Trust is fundamental for human relations. Everyone I asked knows almost what it means but none could give me definition. Neither could I find something that was useful on the internet. Lot’s of synonyms, think of reliable, stable, confidence, and many more words but no real definition. This did help a little: “a belief that something is true”. But true and trust seem to have the same root, and the belief might give us a glimpse of the true meaning. Trust is not the same as facts.
What is trust?
So let me give you a definition:
“Trust is the ability of one or more people to enter into a relationship for a future activity where there is a measure of uncertainty, often coincided with giving before receiving.”
Everyone understands that trust is a valuable thing to have trust and we use it all the time in our daily lives, whatever the context. When we bring our kids to kindergarten, we trust that they will be safe and sound in the afternoon when we pick them up. Look at the picture, a kid holding hands a blowing bubbles. My kids do it all the time too, maybe giving them a feeling of safety and connection. The child gives trust to the parent and we act accordingly…
When we do a complex business deal, no matter how big the contract, there is always trust involved. No contract is detailed enough to cater for all future events. Without trust, would we do a deal at all? There are in my opinion different ways to look at trust.
Think of the measure of trust, the type of trust, the level of emotions and rationality involved. Whom do I give trust to and for what reasons? Last year I started on this whitepaper to get some clarity for myself on the subject. But I left it unfinished, not able or wanting to proceed with it. It was just to complicated. Until recently a friend elaborated on the trust issues he saw in the company he is helping. Inspired I found new energy and came up with an idea.
How would it be if we looked at trust from the perspective of the Internal Landscape? The Internal Landscape is in it’s simplicity like a bunch of Lego bricks describing the bricks themselves and the relations between them. They can be used in a given situation and moment in time, to look at yourself (inward) and the person(s) you are dealing with thus understanding deeper motivations for the behaviour of the people involved. We have been using the Internal Landscape to refine business teachings on for example Power and Intercultural Communication. This resulted in more sophisticated methods of applying communication techniques. Because with models that make us understand better how the person in front of us is communicating, we can refine and more accurately choose our own communication. Thus gaining trust and influence.
Whitepaper on Trust
So here it is. A different way to look at trust and understanding it. Using a part of the Internal Landscape to make sense of such a complex subject. Just click on the link and it is yours. All free, no need to leave any contact details :).
I trust you would provide me with some feedback, comments and observations.